.It's a shame the various promotional posters and video covers are so much better than actually sitting through this meek programmer. A young witch (LeeAnn Baker) in the 17th century is condemned to death during a sacrificial ritual and screams she cannot die. We flash to present day witnessing her decked in leather and mascara killing mortals through mind persuasion to gather souls to resurrect her undead minions. About the coolest thing in this whole venture is how she grows a triple set of racks to provides her zombies slimy soul ectoplasm by nipple (she goes topless several times, but this feeding method is a large chest mold). Otherwise; the blood/gore quota is virtually non-existent, there's far too much time spent ambling through its simple set-up, and the concluding twist involving a young couple onto the witch's evil doings is one you've already seen over-and-over.
THE PIRATES (2014)
7 hours ago