Friday, October 21

Quick, someone call the fucking cops, I dared to open a used record at FYE...

.
The following isn't to BOGD's norms, basically a big bitchfest, but I encountered such a ridiculous situation today that I have to share. I took the day off today to dig around thrift shops (I know, exciting, right?) and stop by the mall for a bite to eat. While there, I walked into a giant FYE to scope out any of their usually tepid Halloween horror title deals. After finding two discs I was on the fence about, I approached the vinyl rack and began flipping through the mostly overpriced and untouched selection.

I found this ratty original 1985 copy of AC/DC's overlooked drunken barroom masterpiece, Fly on the Wall, for $3.99. It was obviously resealed since the edges are all dog-earred and there's a small discount notch chopped out of the bottom left hand corner with no sign of damage to the shoddy plastic. The open edge was "sealed" by a two inch piece of clear tape which I easily slid open with my thumbnail in order to spot-check the condition of the LP and any other contents.

So while I'm holding the record to the light to see if there's any of the multitude of issues that can affect vinyl, I see out of the corner of my eye an employee douche unhinge his douche walkie and say "Frank, come in, a customer just opened a record." I immediately said that it was used to which he replied that it didn't matter and that he saw me open the damn thing. Now mind you, there's dozens of other used vinyl on the racks with no wrapping or sleeves whatsoever. Yet this giant ignorant asshole merely seemed to want to be a giant ignorant asshole for the sake of being a giant ignorant asshole. After having enough I shouted "I'll just buy the motherfucker for four bucks, happy?" After which I left the fourty-five bucks of DVD I was thinking about and bought the record, which is in excellent playing condition, with loud protest. Not to mention the times I've purchased "100% Guaranteed" used DVDs there only for them to look slathered in ointment and driven over by an 18-Wheeler. I'm definitely not trusting their assessment of condition.

I understand retailers are in a constant battle to curb deceit and theft, but when you're trying to sell used, decades old stuff to a small niche of interested people, it's best not to treat those customers doing reasonable things like dumbass criminals out to get you over the measly price of a McDonald's value meal. If they couldn't understand my clear reasons for "opening" a used previously opened twenty-six-year-old thing in which condition is absolutely integral to the value and performance of said thing then they're actually more thick-headed than the false notion of the customers they prejudge. Perhaps there's why they work there?

And it's not like it would be easy to steal a 12" platter without bags of any sort. Sure, I'm going to fold it up and stick it in my breast pocket, right? I feel like revisiting around Christmas, gathering a huge stack of used LPs, forcing the cashier to wait while I check each with a penlight, and then casting them all off as not worth the money as a long line impatiently waits. Or in other words: Hey FYE, fuck you and don't sell vinyl at all if you can't treat the customers that actually still give a damn about the medium with even a modicum of basic respect. Oh, and people would probably buy more if you turned down that goddamn music...
.

4 comments:

Drunketh said...

Fuck FYE! That place totally sucks balls.

By the way, whenever I ever bought a used DVD at Newbury Comics I always opened their plastic wrap up and expected the thing. I never got talked to about it, probably since I'm a scary ass fothermucker, but their guys would either stare at me or come walking by a few times. Sure, it made them nervous, but I've purchased full priced shitty movies from the place before so basically the way I feel about it is I own their asses.

Next time just do something nuts like take a fuckin' huge bite out of the LP and spit it at that guy.

Dr. Blacksteed said...

Hey hey,
Despite the overpricing, I do buy a good bit of vinyl at the local FYE because they have so far (miraculously) had every single title I've gone looking for. If you ask them, they'll open the records for you. However, I second Drunketh, when they get douchy over a $4 album, it's time to go apeshit.

Stacia said...

Back when I was into vinyl in the 1990s, the local shops never had a problem with serious customers looking at the condition of said vinyl before buying. More than once I found someone had replaced the custom inside sleeves (where lyrics and pictures often were) with some horrible plastic crap that held on to dust and ultimately scratched the vinyl, or any other common issues. If a modern-day chain can't handle that used vinyl needs to be looked at before being purchased, they shouldn't be selling vinyl at all.

My guess is a lot of their employees are completely unfamiliar with vinyl, which again is a corporate problem as much as it's the problem of the life newbies hired at FYE.

Anthony1138 said...

I'm glad that the FYEs out here are all gone. Their prices sucked and on more than one occasion I had to return a scratched up used DVD. Never saw vinyl there, but when I do buy used vinyl I like to check it... especially if it's over a $1.

Seriously, how the fuck are you gonna steal a record? And how is taking it out of the sleeve going to help? Assholes.

...do you dare tread upon the staircase?
Basement of Ghoulish Decadence, Basement of Ghoulish Archive, and all original material Copyright © 2009-present by Jayson Kennedy. All rights reserved.