Son of a hog bitch, it's always the "faux horror" titles that are discovered in mint condition. This past weekend I found Academy Video's Slashed Dreams VHS clamshell in spectacular condition. The only problem is, by all accounts, this isn't a Horror film. It seems Academy was trying to cash-in on the mid-'80s Freddy craze since Robert Englund is somewhere in this drama with a horror-esqe retitling, synopsis, and hack n' slash artwork. I'm not going to watch it, at least not anytime soon. I prefer to bask in the cool art, imagine the film by the synopsis, and think about how yummy granola is. I also like how the trite tagline is placed right by illustrated girl's ass! Academy certainly knew what their target audience would be looking at!